Published on
January 30, 2007 in
voffle.
Earlier today I was killing time by attempting to shop for rare and obscure camera lenses which I suspected (correctly) would not be in stock at a particular Oxford-street electronics vendor. As I waited for the shop manager to type boring stock-codes into his inventory system a large man adjacent to me asked another shop-worker for directions to Great Portland Street.
English was obviously not the shop-worker’s first language and he was having difficulty giving directions to the customer. His advice consisted of lots of hand-waving and wild gesticulation. I felt compelled to assist, as my knowledge of the streets of London is second to none. I explained that from our position on Oxford street, any of the perpendicular roads nearby would take him to Great Portland Street, and that the station was pretty much unmissable. I fixed him with a beatific smile as one does when one offers helpful directions.
It was that moment that I noticed something familiar about the man: Long shoulder-length slightly greying brown hair. A pointed and arched nose, and two distinctively truncated digits from his right-hand. I may not have been able to acquire the fabled Nikkor 18-200 VR lens, however I had achieved something far greater. My boyhood ambition had been fulfilled: I had actually met Terry Nutkins.
He noticed my stare hat his fingers. He looked at me and said “Yes, I am who you think I am”. I replied with only slight exaggeration “You were a childhood hero”. Thanks he said, and then addressing the whole assembled staff of the shop and myself he said “I’m working on a new project. I’m doing some research at Great Portland St”, and then briskly walked out leaving the enormous Canon video camera he was examining on the shop’s cluttered counter.
My mind was a whirr - this man who was once friend to all marine mammals (except otters) was obviously embarking on a new videographic project. Somehow the location of Great Portland Street is critical to this project, and it was none other than myself who ensured that he got there. I can rest easy tonight knowing that this great man is one step closer to realizing his dreams.
But why was this star of “The Really Wild Show” and “Animal Magic” ignorant of the location of Great Portland Street? As a long-serving BBC type he would have attended countless meetings at Broadcasting house which was but five minutes walk away. Anybody who goes to broadcasting house knows that Great Portland Street is pretty much directly North. He certainly seemed not to have lost his marbles - I can only think that he was so deep in thought about his important animal projects to contemplate mundane London geography.
The latest podcast on Steve Eley’s Escape Pod has to be the best story of the series to date. For the uninitiated, Escape Pod is a weekly sci-fi audio magazine. It features the best in new fiction and spans the fantasy and science-fiction genres.
This week’s story “How Lonesome a Life Without Nerve Gas” was written by James Trimarco and narrated by Resonance FM’s Frank Key. Cory Doctrow of BoingBoing states that “Frank Key, of the Hooting Yard podcast, gives it a dry, sardonic reading that fits perfectly.”, and I am in agreement. BoingBoing also link to Frank’s web-site (but sadly not the podcast feed).
I’ve been trying to get Cory Doctorow to read / listen to Hooting Yard on the Air for some time now (well at least the brief time that I knew him and he lived in London). Could it be that he too is an aficionado of Frank Key’s “Hooting Yard on the Air“?
Resonance FM composer and noise prankster Dan Wilson walked away from this year’s Arts Foundation awards as the winner in the electronic composition category. Asked what he would do with his prize money, he revealed that it would be used to build an improved version of “Corrosion Suite”, an electromagnetic composition in which the sound of rusted and rusting materials would form the basis of a new soundscape… or whatever.
The truth is I hardly understood because I was far too excited to see him win to pay too much attention to the details.
I wonder if supporting your favourite conceptual artist is something like supporting a football team. You get to follow their ups & downs, and you can be sure that their lives are more painful or ecstatic than your own.
My Dan Wilson audio archive can be found at http://epistaxis.stodge.org.
I am delighted to announce the yet another exciting Resonance FM Project: The publication of Frank Key’s new anthology: “Befuddled By Cormorants“, a collection of 52 thrilling stories from the acclaimed radio series “Hooting Yard on the Air”.
It was my privilege to act as the typesetter of this wonderful collection of short prose. For more information, please visit Frank’s web-site. Alternatively you can buy the book direct from the publisher.
According to the blurb on YouTube, “This is the video for “Minger” by Meadow House (from ‘Tongue Under a Ton of Nine Volters’ on Alcohol Records). Upon its release as a single in 2006, this was rampantly dvd-dropped in public places around London and Hertfordshire.”
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Meadow House is also known as Dan Wilson, the man who gave us Epistaxis Time and Exciting Hellebore Shew on Resonance FM. The wonky sound of this recording comes from Dan’s preference of minging home-made musical instruments. The box-like fretless electric guitar in the 5th second of the video is but one of the contraptions that were specially built in order to facilitate this recording.
You want that job in IT but dont have the right credentials? If like me you slept through university, skipping classes and exploiting university for maximum leisure potential then you may have missed out on the opportunity to publish any scientific papers.
Fortunately, this system uses a context-free gramar to generate all the papers you might ever wish to submit. Click on the important looking diagram to view some pre-generated twaddle written by some made-up names.
